Valentine's Day at

I am all for businesses looking to expand their market share and stretching their creative muscles when advertising to customers ways to spend money.

But White Tower on Valentine's Day?

Feast on slyders ® and fries at White Castle on Valentine's Day between 5 and 8 p.m. Reservations required for hostess seating, with your own server at a candlelit red plastic covered table.[Photo by ntkriced]

Or take it 'to go':

Get a "Cupid’s Crave Kit," which includes eight cheeseburgers, one sack of fries, two regular soft drinks, coupons and keepsake items to heat up your homespun romance.

['Keepsake' items?]

This is what I think when I see White Tower:

Notwithstanding Paul Newman's comment on adultery ("Why fool around with hamburger when you have steak at home?"), I suspect that a great many American love affairs began over hamburgers. Maximillian and I met over a bacon-cheeseburger at $2 Bill's, a greasy spoon (long defunct) in Los Angeles. John Edwards proposed to his wife, Elizabeth, at a Wendy's, and they celebrate every wedding anniversary at one.

"Hot and juicy," I can understand, but "steamed and 'Martinized'"?

WILL U B MINE?